9 Jan 2016

I am not a pink Lolita

I felt inspired to write this as I spend more and more time thinking about my Lolidrobe and how to make it more versatile, how to get the most wear out of the main pieces I already own with carefully chosen builder pieces. My newly obtained income allows me to buy things like blouses, which are a great way of changing a main piece and its overall look and feel.

Let me say this now: it's not that I don't like pink as a colour, for Lolita or anything else, in fact I have pink nails as I type this post out. And while my regular wardrobe might not have a lot of pink in it, it's still there. I don't hate on pink as a colour and I don't judge people simply for choosing to wear that colour, whatever their style.



However, as I think about it, part of what attracted me to Lolita, and what still attracts me, is that it is very different from our contemporary mainstream society and fashion. In my life I have often felt different from the majority of my peers, although fortunately very, very rarely to the point where I'd feel like I didn't fit in. I was always that girl who was more mature than her age would suggest. I was (and am) the bookish person inclined towards being introverted in an age when reading books for pleasure seems bizarre and where people my age regularly go out partying in clubs. Over the years I learned to embrace the things that make me me and not give a damn about what the people I don't know may think about that, which translates into being less afraid to express that through the things I wear, amongst others. And Lolita fits into that ideology.

At the same time this will to express and accentuate my own style and personality, the will to be different, sometimes becomes a silly rebellion against nothing - like when everyone encourages me to watch something that's very popular and in at the time. With Lolita fashion, because I mostly see myself as a Sweet Lolita, this turned into being adamant about not wearing pink if I can avoid it. The idea that Sweet Lolita (and for some people, Lolita fashion in general) has to equal pink seems quite strong to me, which is why for so long I never even looked at pink Lolita clothes.

This is changing now, albeit very slowly and not without some internal battles. Doing that wardrobe post visualised clearly what sort of things I have, helping me plan some new coordinates and figure out what items I still miss for them. What transpired is that having a pink blouse would mean being able to use it for at least two out of my six JSKs, if not for five.

And yet whenever I think to myself: "Ok, girl, let's get you a pink blouse for Lolita", I can't stop that internal resistance, no matter how many cute and budget friendly blouses I come across. On a logical level I know that this wouldn't make me any less of a person or shake my values, as I haven't been vocal about this until now, and yet emotionally and very irrationally I feel as if that would somehow compromise my resolution to maintain my own style within Lolita or my unwillingness to conform (despite the "Sweet Lolita equals pink" thing being entirely untrue and in my head).

As I type this, I am looking at my Bodyline macaron dress, carefully laid out and waiting to be worn the following day. I think that as time will go on I will feel more and more ok about starting to include more pink in my Lolidrobe, through blouses or other pieces (though likely not main pieces - I am yet to find a pink Lolita dress I'd like, the prints on them tend to look a bit washed out for me when I prefer my prints to be bold and stand out). In the past I have felt similarly about including black in my Lolidrobe, this one because with such a multitude of colours in Lolita and me not leaning anywhere near gothic I felt it too dark and depressing - and yet I have recently bought a black blouse, as well as decided to keep a pair of very loliable black heels, which at first I wanted to sell (it's fortunate that nobody wanted them, eh?).

Because at the end of the day, it's just fashion. But like all fashion, it needs and deserves to be worn, as often as possible, and if pink items will allow me to do that, then why resist them so stubbornly? It's not like one pink item will suddenly overpower my Lolidrobe. 

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