2018 Lolita Goals

Here we are again. I like evaluating how far I’ve come in Lolita fashion through these little goals I set myself, although the longer I’m in the fashion, the harder I find it to keep these away from being about purchasing this or that. Wishlists and goals should be separate, but when we’re talking about fashion, it’s not easy to find ways of engaging with it that don’t involve buying pieces. However, I’ll still try.

1. Have at least £200 in my bank account reserved for dream dresses

Every penny counts when it's a dream
It’s the same as always, although I’m not sure if it needs stating since I never actually spent enough to have to stop myself before the last £200 in my bank account is gone. Having said that, it’s good to keep a reminder of how much you’re willing to spend and as the dream dresses I have left on my wishlist now shouldn’t be wildly expensive, I have lowered that amount from £300 last year to £200 this year.

2. Wait a minimum of 48 hours before purchasing something outside of my wishlist

Time is money - especially with impulse
As I am getting more and more wildly creative with storage space and would like to save money towards a trip to Japan (whenever that may end up being, since my boyfriend’s work is incredibly awkward with approving his leave), this seems like the most reasonable way of limiting my spending without feeling too restricted and like I can’t buy anything. It should also encourage me to focus on filling in the gaps in my wardrobe rather than spontaneously adding new things in. A cooling off period of a minimum of 48 hours will hopefully mean that the item I’ve suddenly found will either sell out or I will realise that I only wanted it because it’s cheap, not because of a genuine want. For new releases, this will be modified to 48 hours since the brand releases a full preview i.e. the dress can be clearly seen (the cut, the print, the colourways etc.) This rule will only apply to items that are strictly Lolita and I will review it after 6 months.

3. When in Japan, try on a sack dress, a true high-waist/empire waist JSK and, if possible, AatP's Sleepless Masquerade in the Twilight JSK I

Would be nice if this kind of cut
suited me...
This is a condensed repeat from last year’s unfulfillable goal. All of these aim to inform me as to what I look and feel like in certain dress cuts that are becoming more common in newer releases. As for the AatP dress, this has been a dream item of mine since I first saw it, but everything points to it being too small for me. If I get a chance, I will muster the courage to try it on and on the off-chance that it does fit, I will purchase it. Although let’s be honest, I’m not holding my breath for that.
Edit (18/01/18): I have a date for when my boyfriend and I will be going to Japan (well, rough date), which is March 2019, so this will be postponed until next year.

4. Learn how to crop cardigans

From cropping cardigans to making
my own clothes - eventually.
The problem with cardigans is that branded ones are pretty expensive for what they are, but it’s incredibly hard to find a cropped length one offbrand, even if they’re easy to modify in other ways. I have now heard from various sources that cropping cardigans yourself is not difficult, so I would like to acquire that skill. Especially since I now own a sewing machine, so wouldn’t have to do all that by hand. I have a couple of tutorials on that bookmarked already and I have a few cardigans that I would like to crop, although in my fear of messing that up I’ll probably buy an ugly, cheap cardigan in a charity shop to practice on (so that there’s no regret or waste if I do mess up). The idea is for me to get good enough at this so that the cardigans will look good and save loads of money. Fingers crossed!

5. Every new main piece has to be worn at least once by the end of the year

Clothes are wasted when they're
not worn.
Well, ideally it would be worn within no more than 3 months of the item being received, but I know that sometimes there may be quieter periods with fewer opportunities for that. Essentially, the aim here is to make sure that I don’t finish the year with main pieces that have never been worn. It can be tempting to ‘save’ a dress for a special occasion and that special coordinate, but ultimately these are clothes, not every outfit has to be perfect and it’s pointless to buy something that’s never worn. As my other aim is to spend less in general, in case I don’t have any new ones, I will aim to give priority to those dresses I haven’t worn in a long time (and will use past outfit posts to track what was worn and when).

6. Organise the Winter ILD for my comm

So many ideas on how to celebrate ILD
Photo by Dominic Alves.
I have a great idea which I hope others will like as well, I have done loads of research around it and I’ve already put my name down on our comm’s meet planner document. All that’s left to do is to crunch some numbers and then actually do it. At this point in time I have done one casual meet and one themed one and I’m also doing another casual meetup in February. On top of this I’ve done some event organising through my work and volunteering at uni, so I feel confident in being able to pull off a good ILD meet, but there’s always that hint of doubt at the back of your mind if people will enjoy your vision or if everything will go according to that carefully drafted, researched and provisionally timetabled plan.

7. Attend at least one Lolita event or meet outside of the UK

Pack as lightly as possible to save space
for poof!
Photo by Jon Rawlinson.
In the spirit of ‘I won’t miss another SFE’ event, but also understanding that the rumours of an SFE hiatus may prove to be true, I’m keeping this goal as open-ended as I can. Therefore it includes both a meet and an event, whichever might be easier to arrange and do. Also, notice the very clever use of ‘outside of the UK’. This opens doors as near as the Republic of Ireland (which is very accessible to me as I have something like 3 flights a day to Dublin from my local airport) and as far as, well, wherever. So whether it’s a meet in Japan or an event in Spain (and there is one already on the cards that I have bookmarked for November 2018!), a brand tea party in Paris (finally!?) or a museum visit in New York (because who knows what could happen), as long as there are other Lolitas, the event is not organised purely because of my visit and it’s not in England, Scotland, Wales or Northern Ireland, literally anything goes. To me Lolita meets and events are some of the most fun things happening in my life and there are so many Lolitas around the world whom I’d love to meet, so if I make it happen at least once in 2018, I’ll be utterly delighted!

8. Connect with my Lolita lifestyle

Don't be shady, be a lady!
As I’ve been reading various posts in various places about what it means to be a lifestyle Lolita, I reflected on my own lifestyle. While by many categories I could consider myself one, I still feel like I’m not (e.g. because I don’t wear it as often as I would like outside of meets). I’ve never really aspired to be a lifestyle Lolita, but I would like my routine to be a little bit more elegant and to do something that could be considered to be part of Lolita lifestyle. Yet thinking of what that something could be was harder than I anticipated. So after really a lot of thought and research, I have come up with a short list of ideas on what I could realistically do to engage with Lolita lifestyle more in 2018:
  • Have a fancy brunch at the weekend (I’ve even made a list of easy but fancy recipes that aren’t too much effort to do at home, but will save money by not going out)
  • Drink tea from my porcelain cup (still not been used since I purchased it)
  • Watch a period film or drama
  • Do nail art manicure (either myself or at a salon) – bonus points if it matches a coordinate I’m about to wear
  • Craft something (anything)
  • Take a trip somewhere nice but local (e.g. Saltaire, Haworth, York etc.)
  • Spend the day properly reading an old Lolita magazine/re-reading any of the Lolita books that I have
  • Bake a cake/make a homemade dessert
My aim is to do the above at least once a month, since that seems manageable and they all could also count as treats as well as connecting with my Lolita lifestyle. Of course, if I could manage this more often, then that would be great, but this is a reasonable minimum.

9. Improve and boost my online presence and content

I love blogging and want this to come
across better!
This one has been on my mind for a while now. I am serious about this blog and all the things I do as Cupcake Kamisama, so I would love for my online presence to reflect that a bit better. At the same time I recognise that the most prominent Lolita bloggers/vloggers/well-known personas invest a lot of time into things like social media and brand building, most of which is a time investment I may not be able to put in just yet. Diving into the deep end straight away is a big undertaking, but here are the few things that I would like to do and some that I am thinking about (any input on your part would be more than welcome):
  • Change the blog’s graphic design – I picked this one as it was closest to what I had in mind and free to use, so no copyright infringements etc. However, it is generic and I don’t think it entices readers to stay as best as it could. Ideally I would commission a custom design logo I could use across the various media I use, but this requires some research into costs vs how much I’d be comfortable spending. But even if I don’t manage that, I would love to change the look of the blog somehow in 2018.
  • Improve my video space – whilst YouTube isn’t my priority, for the occasions that I do film something, I would like the space to look better. Now, I’m not prepared to pump money into this, but surely there must be ways to improve quality with what I have. It will be a challenge, but it’s a challenge that I would like to take on.
  • Write more about things I did rather than things I got – as a firm believer that you don’t need to always buy something new to participate in Lolita fashion, I would like to reflect that on my blog too. Luckily, this ties in with some of the other goals I have here, so it should simply be a matter of documenting that. Of course, where applicable I will still post reviews in one form or another and talk about purchases, but I will aim to dedicate more space to activities than purchases.
  • Start a funding page – this is on the ‘not sure yet’ list. While I blog because I enjoy it, there’s nothing wrong with monetising on your hobby if possible. I was thinking about Ko-Fi, since Patreon seems a bit too… involved or serious for what I had in mind. What stops me is the thought at the back of my head that this blog isn’t big enough to justify asking people for financial contributions, however small. So let me know what you think: are you in favour of the idea or would you support such an endeavour? What kinds of rewards would you like to see for contributors? As someone who likes a debate, I can talk myself both in and out of that, so knowing what other people think of it would help.

And let’s stop right there. :P What I’ve written here ended up as quite a serious undertaking, having started really light and ‘what can I do that isn’t about buying stuff’. However, I think that I can manage that and I know that it will enrich my life as a Lolita and my engagement with the fashion. Whether I’ll succeed at everything, I don’t know, but I’ll certainly give it my best shot.

Have you set yourself any Lolita-related goals for 2018? Have you been ambitious or more cautious? And if you’re not the type for making New Year’s resolutions, what would you like your 2018 to look like?


  1. Nice goals list <3 I have set small lolita goals for this year, such as wearing more lolita coords or keep building a cohesive wardrobe, as my current lolita wardrobe is a hot mess.

    Marina | Teapots and Frills

    1. Small goals are great to stay on top of things and ensure success, as long as you know what exactly you mean by them. If they're vague, it's easy to get lost in what you were trying to say and that leaves you unsure if you met your goal or not. Best of luck! :)


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