End of 2020 Lolidrobe Reassessment Post

Phew, aren’t we glad to see the end of this horrible year! Granted, it’s not like everything will magically change as soon as it becomes 2021, one minute past midnight we’ll still be fighting the pandemic, waiting for the world to become safe again. But New Year always brings with it a sense of hope and a fresh start, that things can and will get better. We’re also usually refreshed after however much of a break we got for the Christmas period, and the beginning of a new year tends to be a slow start, so it means we have a bit more energy to fight the same battles as we normally would have.

Overview of Purchases

Let’s be honest, resisting the temptation to fill a void left by cancelled/postponed events with purchases was hard. All things considered, I am very proud of myself for doing so well in that regard, because while I know that a lot of purchases were simply made for non-lolita items, I also know that things could’ve been much worse.

• 2 main pieces
• 7 tops (1 classic blouse in beige/ivory*)
• 1 cardigans/boleros
• 4 jackets (1 classic overdress in gold* and 1 classic in green)
• 2 pairs of socks/tights (1 pair of classic ivory x green OTKs)
• 3 pairs of shoes
• 1 bag
• 1 pair of bloomers
• and 40 sets of accessories (1 classic gold x blue brooch*, 1 classic gold x green necklace*, 1 classic/gothic gunmetal x clear necklace*, 1 pair of classic gold x red earrings*, 1 classic/gothic black necklace, 1 classic gold x green ring, 1 classic ring in  1 classic crown in gold, 1 classic crown in green, 1 classic crown in green)

My aim for 2020 was to prioritise spending money on events over things, and as I mentioned already, resisting the temptation to fill a sudden void was hard. So to see that I only bought 62 things for my lolita wardrobe this year is reassuring. Last year this number was at 85, which means a roughly 30% decrease in purchases this year. Furthermore, looking at where I got things from, there were a lot more indie brand buys, a lot more second hand purchases that were offbrand and local, a lot more handmade items - as well as fewer things bought from Japan or China, whether new or second hand. It’s a good reflection of how my priorities have shifted, certainly over the course of this year. It’s something that I would like to keep up, though considering how the looming dread that is Brexit will likely stop many indie brands from selling to folks based in the UK, only time will tell how viable it will be to keep with this direction.

The Year That Went Wrong

Let’s not ignore the elephant in the room - 2020 was shit. There is no average person for whom 2020 was legitimately good (no doubts lads like Jeff Bezos had a time of their life, hence the differentiation). We coped as best we could, managed however was within our means at the time, kept calm and carried on in the words of wartime posters. Although the lolita community overall pulled together, embracing the switch to virtual meetups and organising virtual conventions with panels, fashion walks and tea parties, this was merely a sugar cube for a chocolate addict, designed to keep us going, not to satisfy the actual craving. Even those who don’t normally engage with their local communities, the lonelitas and introverts, had to make adjustments as solo adventures to local eateries and cultural outlets were no longer an option. Whatever kept you going, you are here now. You made it. And that’s what matters the most. Do not invalidate the achievement that this is and know that I am grateful that you made it.

This stock photo by Engin Akyurt perfectly encapsulates this year: wearing a mask because we're living through a global pandemic, scrolling through the news in hopes to find some good amongst all the shit ones, and being in the dark about when will this all end.

The Year of Accidental (?) Lifestyler

Lolita became the biggest coping mechanism for me this year. Being able to work from home and not have to be ready, dressed and out the door by a certain time meant that dressing up in frills became easier - and I did as much of that as I could. In one year I’ve worn and documented more lolita fashion coordinates than I have between 2017 and 2019 COMBINED! Although we know that this isn’t how it actually worked out, I’ve worn enough coords this year to work out as one every three days! It’s no mean feat, though certainly not one that I could’ve planned or one that I would’ve achieved without being locked in. Would I trade this for the ability to have meetups? Yes, in a heartbeat. But since that’s not a trade that anyone can make possible, I enjoy what I was able to do and look forward to seeing how I could continue that. The fact is that I won’t be able to keep this up forever in a post-pandemic world. At the same time, dressing in lolita so regularly has really changed me, not only becoming a habit of sorts, but making me feel really weird in other (casual) clothes. Not in any truly negative way, just made them feel even closer to pyjamas or sweatpants: clothes that are lazy and comfortable, and not ones that one should really be seen in. Is anyone out there getting what I’m trying to say here? Please tell me that I don’t sound like I’ve lost all my marbles.

The Year of More YouTube

Although YouTube was never my primary platform or means of expression, with so much more time and energy at the weekends freed up by not going to meetups, it had to go somewhere. Doing more on my YouTube channel, finally getting round to some of those bigger and more talkative videos, has been a great way of using that excess creative energy, even if this has come at the price of doing fewer Wunderwelt Libre posts. However, I am very proud of each video that has gone out and I still have several pre-recorded ones that are waiting their turn to be edited and released. Again, I’m not sure how long I will be able to sustain it, though since I’m not pressuring myself to do more than one a month, assuming that I can record one video a month now to always have something in advance, I should be good for a while. Video ideas are always welcome and having actual Patreons support me in that gives me all the kick in the backside I need. And every new one makes me do a very giddy dance!

I published almost 30 videos in 2020 (over if you include the Patreon exclusives), including some things that were really new to me like All Frills Baking and the Fitness for Lolitas. Going from unboxings and then lookbooks to trying a range of videos has made lockdown vastly more exciting.

Review of 2020 Goals

Although I’ve not done badly with those and the ones I haven’t met were due to the pandemic, since those were the bigger goals, it’s hard to not feel at least a little discouraged. Not that this could’ve been predicted, but still. I’ve taken that into account and made sure to make 2021 goals that are less reliant on external forces and external gratification.

• Did I set up my PayPal for lolita and only make lolita purchases using cash stored in it: For the most part, but not always. There have been some purchases, usually minor ones, that I made from money in my current account. Could I have transferred it to my PayPal? Yes, probably. But it seemed like an unnecessary step, and it’s only happened twice to my recollection, which is still pretty good going.
• Did I wait at least 48 hours before buying something from outside of my wishlist: Yes except once, which was for a relatively small purchase (one necklace). Which is really good, again, considering that we’re talking about 2020 as a year and about 58 purchases in total.
• Have I prioritised events over purchases: As much as it was possible considering that events were not a thing. I bought less than I did last year, when there were events, so I guess this counts as a goal met.
• Did I organise another Man Meet and OT-Tea Party: This goal was dropped due to, well, obvious reasons.

Here it is - 2020 in review. There were times when it felt like this year would never end, so even though I’m bringing the final reassessment post to earlier than I’d normally do, it’s still a good feeling to wrap this up. Of course, the world isn’t going to get better overnight, we have at least several months of 2021 being the same as what we’re having now at varying degrees of intensity. But whatever actually happens, there is always tomorrow and the hope that it will be better. And the rest we usually get over the Christmas period helps us tackle new challenges with a bit more strength than we had previously.

And that is what I would like to wish you all. That you are able to rest right now, regain your strength, and restore your inner balance, whatever that tangibly means to you. Hopefully 2021 will be kinder to us all - Mana knows how badly we all need it!